when evening skies appear

Well, when you are packing to come home after a three week vacation just six weeks after

a five week vacation, I guess it is very unfair, or at least unpopular to find anything to complain about.  I wish

I could bottle both the weather and the mood and bring it north…hitch it right onto the

bumper and pull it all the way through the Shenandoah Valley, right through the State of

New York and deposit it in New England for a wonderful spring.

That’s our plan.

I am sitting by my open window and the sound of the surf is loud, pounding and

constant like the rhythm of a heart beat.  The soft easterly breeze has not stopped since

we got here in March.  Tonight there is a touch of humidity in the air, but nothing

uncomfortable…it just seems to bring the wetness of the sea mist right into the living room.

I have loved the breeze and the sea more than in a very long time.  I had time, it

seems, to take better care of myself and I have discovered that I need help in finding

a way to continue this taking care of myself when back in my more normal routine..

Also, this time away has really given me pause to consider my age and what it means to

be an older man and what it means about what I eat and how many hours I work,

and all that stuff that I sort of put just behind–being successful.  I am seriously considering

retirement.  This is a relatively new thought for me because I just always figured that I

would work until I died, like Phyllis Meadow and all those other analysts who seemed to have

given their lives over to analysis so freely.

I am serious about wanting to write and I am serious about wanting my writing to go

in the direction of publishing some essays.  I am already a columnist for two on-line

start up magazines.  In both cases, I was asked to contribute work because they

had seen one of my previous articles.  So, it may even be more than a pipe dream…And,

if it turns out to be nothing more than a pipe dream, that is alright too.

I have enjoyed creating digital images from photographs and from watercolors.  The one

attached to this note is a watercolor enhanced in photoshop that I painted tonight.

I think that what is most profoundly new for me, or at least new in the way that I

recognize it easier, is that I love just following my joys & desires, and I then equally enjoy

my states of gratitude and appreciation.  Although I have always appreciate aspects

of the world and my life, I think I am more permanently there now than I have ever been…

I find myself very happy and often content just being here, so that is a clear message

to get myself here as much as i can.  It feels good.

So, to all of you who I am writing this note to.  I am looking forward to coming north.

Hoping we can get together soon.  I have made plans to come back here at the end of May

or early June….And as Henry James so eloquently said:  “…and the rest is the madness of Art.”

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